Casino stories: real life and fantasy

Instead of university, I was sitting in Eldorado and playing poker. It annoyed me as much as possible, the winnings are minimal, even at max bet (ten rubles), and the chances of losing were very high. But I had a goal: to win the coveted amount and leave, and a plan: to play only poker, to make the missing money with minimal bets, with minimal risks. Naturally, the strategies of a gambling addict in anticipation of the game and in the game process are two big differences, after the first lost hundred in poker, a five-hundred flew into dolphins, and then another one, and then the remaining 350 rubles.
And again emptiness, again hopelessness, again absence of thoughts. Only one desire, only one desire - to win back, no matter what it costs me, I have to win back by any means.
I don't understand where this decision came from, no one suggested it to me, I never thought about it before, even the day before, when I was thinking about where to get money, this thought didn't cross my mind. But the fact remains a fact, and I'm already standing in front of the door with the sign "pawn shop". Taking off the gold chain with the cross from my neck, I gave it to the appraiser along with my passport.
- 540 rubles, the amount of interest..., the loan must be repaid in two months, that is, no later than February 12, 2004.
“Let’s go,” I said without the slightest doubt.
I didn't even hear the percentage amount. It didn't interest me. After all, it would only be in two months, and the problem exists here and now. It needs to be solved, and solved urgently.
Coming out of the pawnshop, I thought that at home I still have a bracelet for my hand, which my stepfather gave me two years ago, because he didn't like it, and it was 3 sizes too big for me, so it was gathering dust in a box in my desk. And it's three times heavier than my thin chain. But more on that later. In the meantime, I have 540 rubles to win it back...
...
There was a lot of truth in that call, I was really going home to pick up the bracelet and pawn it, I was really sick and my illness was in its most active phase.
There could be no other outcome to all this gaming madness. A bracelet in a pawn shop. 1660 on hand. Drain. That's it. The end...
...
Evening. I was lying in my room and crying. No, I wasn't crying, I was sobbing, howling like a beluga whale. The last time I cried was probably in the 6th grade. I couldn't stop, I wanted to scream, scream at the top of my lungs. I didn't understand why I was turning from a normal guy, in just a year, into some kind of *****, into an animal that, because of its lust, crosses all its moral principles. My soul felt so vile, this heavy burden was squeezing everything inside. I thought for a long time, didn't sleep until the morning, I just couldn't. Time 07:35.
I came into my mother’s bedroom, touched her shoulder and quietly whispered:
- Mom, I really need to talk to you urgently.
Mom jumped out of bed as if she hadn’t slept at all.
- What happened? Why at 7 am?
- Let's go to the balcony, I'll tell you everything.
I told my whole story from the very beginning to the very end, tears flowed like a stream, the truth was gushing out of me like a fountain. Mom listened attentively. I was insanely afraid of her reaction, I thought she would simply destroy me, but I could no longer continue to wriggle out, building up problems. Instead of shouting and condemning, Mom said in a calm and monotonous voice:
- Sasha, we all, absolutely all, make mistakes in our youth. Only some step on the same rake, others draw conclusions and do not repeat their mistakes. I hope you are in the second category of people and will not get into this crap again.
- No, I promise, never again! It's a lesson for life!
It was as if something in my chest had loosened up and it became much easier.

I acted completely automatically, I didn't even have any doubts or torments. I didn't think about the consequences, about what I would do if I lost. I didn't care about all this at all. The gambling swings started again. I kept running from machine to machine. Sometimes I lost, sometimes I raised a little. And like a fool, I would wrap the money in the receipt after the rise, and then take it out again if I lost. Well, finally, this whole gambling whirlwind came to its logical conclusion.
Balance 0.
Absolute zero.
I don't remember how I ended up in the car, sitting and looking into the distance at one point. Music from the slot machines was buzzing in my head, the same one from the "Dendy" console. The clock showed 20:47. I spent eight and a half hours in the gaming club. No thoughts. A completely empty head. Where to get money for utilities? How to pay? What will happen next? Questions to which I did not know the answers.
I took out my phone and started calling my friends:
- Hello, Lyokha, hi, I'm calling on business. I have problems, can you lend me some money?
...
On Monday, I made a photocopy of the payment receipts at the copy center. I took a ruler and tore them in half. As a result, I got two fake receipts, supposedly paid, but without those printed blue codes on the back. I went to my grandmother with them. It worked. She didn’t even look at them and threw them in the general pile with the paid receipts. Now I had time, about three weeks, to pay the utilities without the scam being discovered...

I played exclusively in spinners where you had to catch free games.
The machine greedily ate the first 500 rubles.
line7
start
three kings
Win 10
start, start, start
- Two, bitch, where's the third!!!
start
Three hats
win 25
- Just shove them up your ****, give me three faces!
Start, start, start
Balance 0
- Holy shit, he won't let me!
The second five-ball flew.
- Let's try the ninth one.
Line 9
Start, start, start.
The balance was melting before our eyes, there were 132 credits left.
- There are three masks!!!
8 free games
- Come on, ***.ina, you've almost eaten a ruble. Put hearts. The maximum combination for the whole freebie is three gramophones.
Win 146.
- Fuck, I got back 290 rubles, thank you very much.
Start, start, start.
Balance 0.
There were 420 rubles left in my pocket. I took a sip of the already cold coffee.
- Yeah, fuck it, - he shoved in 400 rubles.
Start, start, start.
Balance 0.
I went outside, lit a cigarette. I felt really bad, empty. After losses I always felt like I was hit on the head with a shovel. Nothing hurts, but it's like I'm in space, in zero gravity.
...
I sat at the machine for about two hours, moving my balance back and forth. It was as if the machine was playing with me, sometimes lowering me, sometimes raising me again. My phone vibrated in my pocket, I looked at the screen "Businka" (Natalia). I ran like a bullet into the common room of the cinema, so that she wouldn't accidentally hear the hoots coming from the machines:
- Hello, hi.
- Hi, why haven't you called me? It's already two o'clock in the afternoon, and there's been no call or text from you. - Natalya said in an offended voice.
- Sorry. I'm just busy. I'm here at my grandma's for now, I asked you to help me. I'll be free in about 2 hours, no sooner. Let me come to you at about 5.
“Well, come on, see you later,” Natalya said in the same offended voice and hung up.
I returned to my poker. The machine continued to "*******" me, driving the balance back and forth, but still, about an hour later I withdrew 500 rubles and switched to Admiral gaminator. I chose the game Marco polo/camels and put in 500 rubles. The same five-ruble note was still in my pocket.
Start.
Literally on the fourth or fifth scroll, I heard, so caressing to the ear, the cherished:
Thump, thump, thump.
- Yes, f..k. Well, come on.
10 free games.
Start.
It was free. The winnings were gradually increasing below.
Thump, thump, thump.
Extension. These three heads of the werepeople brought me boundless joy and happiness, exactly the same feelings as in childhood, when my mother unexpectedly gave me some toy.
Start.
- Give me more!!!
Free games are over.
Win 1174.
Start.
Balance 1562.
I spun it up to 1500 and withdrew. The thought of leaving didn't even cross my mind. Although I already had 2000 in my pocket. I moved to the next machine. I lost 500. The next one. I picked up 1200. And these swings continued for quite a long time. Time lost all meaning for me. My phone vibrated in my pocket. "Businka", time 17:21. "F..ck, I'm fucked." With these thoughts, I again ran out into the general hall of the cinema like a bullet:
- Hello.
- Sasha, where are you? It's almost half past five.
- Businka, please forgive me, I got caught up in my grandmother's business and lost track of time. I still have a lot of things to do here, and it looks like we won't be able to meet today.
The snowball of lies and deceit grew larger and larger.

Since the car needed to be filled with gas and parking had to be paid for. I took 100 per day. I almost never went to the canteen, I saved, and if I did, it was a sausage in dough at most. My daily expenses were a pack of cigarettes for 20 rubles - EVERYTHING, and I spent 80 almost every day in the machines. I was happy with this life. I considered the machines a pleasant pastime. And if I managed to win something, then it was just great. But winnings came very rarely. And if there were small splashes, then either that day or the next day I spent everything back. This had been going on for 3 months. But today, surprisingly, luck smiled on me, from 80 rubles (40 tokens), I increased my balance to 400 credits on poker.
- Well, not bad, even very good, 800 rubles - I said to Denis, pressing collect.
Having exchanged the tokens for money, I was about to go home, but Dan suddenly stopped me:
- San, have you tried playing spinners?
- No, I haven't tried it, but I know that these machines are for players with money. You need to bet 9 lines, that's 18 rubles per spin. There's nothing to do there with our kopecks.
- Well, you raised it today. Try 100 rubles. And you can start with a line of 3, you don't have to play 9. Let's go for those dolphins, there's a guy who just put in 5 thousand without a single freebie, I was watching him. I have to give it to him.
- Well, let's try.
We sat down at the device called Dolphins pearl's. We called these devices admirals, they were new, well, or almost new. This was another level.
...
Okay, tomorrow I won't go to university, I'll go straight to "Eldorado" by 9 am, it's much more interesting there than at university. I'll try other spins, maybe I'll get it up. And I'll tell the teacher that I was sick. I hardly ever miss a spin, once is okay. With these thoughts, I went to bed, used my new phone (it was really cool) and fell asleep... That day was a turning point. Before that day, there had been no lies, no set-ups, no debts in my life. Gambling addiction was already present, but only in its initial stage, without any negative consequences, well, except for a lack of finances. From that day on, the rate of development of the disease accelerated sharply. And with my own hands I began to ruin my life at double speed...

Choose a machine, - Denis picked up, - Let's go behind that one, in the corner. - Pointing to the machine, I quickly walked towards it.
I was getting more and more immersed in the game process, sometimes I was dumb, but the guys professionally told me what to do. In general, I lost my fifty in literally 10 minutes, seeing Balance 0 in the corner of the screen.
- Maybe more? You still have some money, - Denis suggested.
- No, enough of a good thing. I lost fifty kopecks and that's enough.
- Then lend us a hundred for both of us, Lyokha. We'll have some fun. What was the point of coming here?
- No problem. Here you go, guys.
I took a hundred-ruble note out of my wallet and handed it to the guys. The fate of the hundred repeated the fate of the fifty-ruble note. The only difference was that it was spent not in 10, but in 25 minutes. At this point our hike was over. And we went home.
...
We sat down in a row. My friends played 1 bet, and I, as planned, played big, max bet 5 tokens.
My eyes were shining like a Christmas toy, I was already turning over the necessary cards without anyone's prompting and waiting for a more or less decent combination. And here is the next deal: 7 of clubs, 9 of clubs, king of diamonds, 6 of clubs, 8 of clubs.
- Fuck guys, it could be a straight flush now, we need a five or a ten of clubs. - I shouted.
The boys jumped off their machines. I turned over the king. 5 of clubs.
Win 250
Double?
- Yeah, f*ck!!! Straight flush. Another beer! Dan, please go, I'll have pineapple juice - I exclaimed with delight, handing over 150 rubles.
- Okay, just don't hit (double) without me.
- I'm not going to double at all. I'll be filming.
Dan went to get some beer. My friends started to persuade me to double it.
- San, take a risk, you still have 150 tokens in your bucket, 85 on your balance. Basically, you're still on your own, but if you double it, the sum will be fire. - Kirya got really worked up.
- Damn, it's still a machine, it won't let you double a big win, - I argued.
- Yes, people double Royal flushes. Go for it! Take a risk! - Kirill did not let up.
Denis returned with beer and juice, we clinked glasses and I pressed "yes".
Queen of Hearts.
- ***.ь!!! I told you, he won't let me double it. Damn it, he listened.
- The last one!
- In the middle!
The guys were chattering, interrupting each other, and advising which card to open.
With a huge swing, I hit the button with the number 2 like a madman.
Ace of diamonds.
Win 500.
"Double?"
- Come here, darling!!! - I shouted, pressing the "no" button.
My mood reached its peak, I was overwhelmed with happiness. Having thrown all the tokens, I saw the inscription Balance 845 in the corner.
“Take it off, he won’t give you any more,” the boys shouted.
- Either up to 800 or 850, - I answered.
Deal. Two kings, ten, nine, ace. Flip, two, seven, five.
Win 5
"Double?"
- Well, go ahead, double it once and I'll take out 1700 rubles.
"Yes"
Three spades - two crosses.
- Bitch, how could I not get a bad grade!!!
- Take it off before he disappears, he won’t give you any more - the boys continued to shout.
Having reached the balance of 800, I pressed the collect button. My happiness knew no bounds.
...
The three of us were sitting in a nice cafe in the city center and reading the menu. A waiter came up to us:
- Ready to order?
- 300 five-star Ararat cognac, sliced lemon, vegetable plate, meat plate, three Caesar salads with chicken, three cherry juices, and we'll think about the hot one later, - I chattered.
“Okay,” the waitress muttered, writing down the order, took the menu and left.
- Wow, you're living it up. Why buy cognac, you could have washed it down with wine. Will there be any money left for the club? - Stas asked, very surprised.
- Everything is fine. I have some money. My mom gave me a lot. And I found another topic here, how to make money. I made 1100 in an hour today. I bought myself a sweater. How do you like it?
- Yes, the jacket is awesome. What's the topic? How did you do it in 1100 hours? - Stas asked with great interest.
- Casino. Slot machines. You can make money.
- San, it's a scam, they'll let you win once and that's it. Let's drink to you instead. You're an adult now too.
- Let's have a drink. And about the casino, I used to think so too, now I think differently. You can win there. It's just that people who lose can't stop and play until the very end. I won and left. I'm telling you that you can win. We'll go together soon, I'll prove it to you.
- Okay, you'll prove it, you'll prove it. Let's do it for you.

- San, Dan and I are going to Eldik, are you coming with us? Like a year ago on your birthday, remember? - asked Lekha.
- Of course I remember. But no, guys, I don't play. - I answered.
- Well, don't play, who's forcing you? Just hang out with us. - Denis added.
"But really, who's forcing me to play? I'll just watch the boys play and that's it, what's wrong with that?" That's how my brain fooled me again. Easily, unobtrusively and beautifully. Despite the fact that I hadn't slept all night, sat through all my classes, was squeezed out like a lemon, I still went to the smoke-filled gaming room. I was absolutely sure that I wouldn't play, I made a promise to my mother and I wouldn't break it. But without a single note of torment, literally 10 minutes after coming to the slot machines, I had already exchanged the 1000 that was given to me and 500 rubles flew into hearts. Literally immediately I heard the pleasant sound of a free game caught, three masks were displayed on the screen.
8 free games.
Start.
The guys sat on the sides and the three of us pointed out where the apparatus should place the yellow heart.
5 gramophones.
Win 3000. (one credit 2 rubles)
- Yeeeeeeeee. I finally put the heart where it needed to be. Gave 6000, still 4 games left.
There were no more worthy combinations.
Win 3214
Start
Balance 3308
Collect.
- Cameraman, take it off! - I shouted.
There was a red spot shining on the screen, in the middle of which was written collect 3250.
The operator turned the key, the cashier gave me 6500 and I went home to sleep.
Did my conscience torment me for breaking my promise?
No.
Did I realize that I made a big mistake by playing after a 2 month break?
No.
Did I tell myself that I wouldn't go again?
No.
The game devil, like last year, gave me a birthday present. A present equal to almost two of my salaries. I was driving home and convincing myself that there was nothing wrong with the machines. Well, there were some hitches, now it's all behind me. Now everything will be different, I will be able to control myself in the game, I will just play a little bit, especially since I work now, I have my own money. I sincerely believed in this ludomaniac illusion and it made me feel so warm and good...